Johnny English: Reborn Review

Johnny English has returned! The question you got to ask yourself is, why?

When I heard that Johnny English was making his triumphant return to our cinemas, I didn’t really know how to feel. To me it always felt like one of those franchises that never got off the ground, a film that has some good points but had by this point been generally written off as simply ‘mediocre’, despite its genuinely good cast. I didn’t really think that anyone thought back on it that fondly, or felt as if a sequel was warranted, nor that it made enough money to require one of those awful ‘just for the cash’ sequels that we all love so much. So what is Johnny English Reborn? A Reboot? Kicking an already Dead Horse? Or was did Rowen just feel like giving it another go? Well who knows, and in the end it doesn’t matter all that much. Despite the time gap, we have another film which is essentially of the same mould, with many of the same laughs (or similar types of laughs at least) and another story which in the end is just a vehicle for Rowen’s funny Mr Bean-like antics. It’s as if the last eight years never happened!

The Inbetweeners Movie Review

It's ungraceful and at times it certainly isn’t pretty, but if you were a fan of the series, or if you just love faecal matter and penis jokes, you’ll probably enjoy the movie spin off of this somewhat popular British television series. Otherwise, I’d steer well clear.

I’m not sure how I feel about the inbetweeners television series. At first I was rather a large fan, enjoying the first series rather a lot. From the heights of the first series though, as with many television series', the creativity of the story lines waned as it progressed and , to my mind at least, there seemed to be a reliance upon increasing crudeness to get laughs (an ever increasing use of slang descriptions of ladies for example), rather than through interesting story lines. To me, then, the film is a pinnacle of this transition, swapping out the interesting and sometimes cleverly written episodes of the first series, with a story line that is probably as bog standard as you can possibly get, but one where the rude jokes are almost always present. I’m not saying that I’m against this, and sure I did laugh rather more than I was expecting, but really beyond these moments there were many others which had me cringing, not because of the constant references to private parts, but instead because the character interaction, dialogue and plotting was so mind numbingly dull, clichéd and in many points arbitrarily enforced.

Super 8 Review

E.T for a new generation? Not really, but it’s still that summer blockbuster that we have been waiting for with all the charm of a coming of age story, with the action that movie goers of today have come to expect. Anyway, E.T. never had an exploding trains in it, so suck it Spielberg!

I don’t know what I was expecting. O.K. maybe I do know, an E.T for the new generation, or perhaps another Goonies, but with aliens. Well Super 8 isn’t really any of those things, but it certainly plays homage to that now seemingly passed age of cinema that those films represented, when a group of kids can have an innocent adventure, save the world, and be home in time for tea. It is certainly trying to evoke the same vibes, even setting itself within the same time period into which those films were created, evoking all the same 80’s vibes. It would be wrong to suggest that super 8 is nothing more than this though, and it has levels of intrigue and action which far surpasses these contemporaries of genre, even if the story elements aren’t as perfectly constructed.

The Rise of the Planet of the Apes Review

Been on holiday, that's why I haven't written anything. It's definitely not because I'm really, really, lazy...

Stunning special effects and a great cast projects this prequel to the Planet of the Apes saga from a simple money spinner into something that is entertaining, heartfelt and even somewhat believable.

When I heard that a ‘prequel’ to the Planet of the Apes, a series which I don’t really hold any affinity for thanks to a rather poor effort by a one Mr Tim Burton, I was sceptical. How do you portray the world being overrun by apes (a seemingly ludicrous premise) without it seeming ridiculous? Well apparently Director Rupert Wyatt had the answer, and I have to admit, I was wrong. It is possible, and I never thought I would ever say this: I’m excited about where this long running series is going to go next.

Super Review

Some of the plot decisions may seems rather strange and the humour may not be as forthcoming as expected considering the cast, but for what it is, Super is an entertaining movie, though probably one that might have seemed a little more original if it had come out before Kick-Ass.

Super heroes are dumb. Yeah that’s right, they are. Admit it, dudes (or ladies!) running around in spandex fighting crime, at its core, is a silly concept, no matter how well Christopher Nolan can make Batman films. Super fully embraces this silliness and bring us a super hero film along the same lines as Kick-Ass (though possibly even more down to earth), demonstrating that in the real world being a super hero would be far from its cartoonish depiction. Not all suave acrobatics, witty one liners and glitzy costumes, more likely rampant violence, murder, and a warped sense of justice by those with some definite emotional issues.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon Review

You may have thought that the transformers series could simply not get any worse after Revenge of the Fallen. Boy did you think wrong...

He did it again. Michael Bay tricked me into hoping, just that tiny hope, that the new Transformers film wouldn’t but another total steaming pile of trash. That first teaser trailer was actually rather exciting and my eyes boggled at the possibilities of distorting something as cool as the moon landing into the transformers fiction. And do you know what Michael Bay does with all that potential? Absolutely nothing. Instead he brings us another Transformers movie, one that is even worse than those previous films in the series, a feat seemingly unimaginable. So now I’m going to write a review, detailing all the things I hated about Transformers: Dark of the Moon, and you are free to read that, or, if you do not have the time, you could just read this sentence and get on with your lives: Do Not Go And See Transformers: Dark of the Moon – It is simply, irredeemably awful.

13 Assassins Review

To state that 13 assassins is nothing but a poor man Seven Samurai is to sell it totally short. It may not be as original or as well scripted as Kurosawa’s samurai epic, but what it lacks in originality, it makes up in pure intensity and passion. A must see.

Not knowing anything about a film before you go into it is always a pleasure (a fact I reflect on rather ironically as someone who reviews films for others...) Going into 13 assassins, I expected something totally different than what I got; a throw away action film with some samurai trimmings, akin to many other recent samurai based films. Instead what I got was a serious drama, one that takes it source material with upmost respect and discipline, but one that does so with such pure passion, that it simply can’t be over looked. If nothing else, it praises the work of Kurosawa’s most famous film to the greatest extent.

The Green Lantern Review

After watching The Green Lantern I feel like I’ve got a good knowledge of the Green Lantern universe and the origins of the man in the green suit – sadly I didn’t have much fun in the process.

First off, I’d like to say that I know absolutely nothing about the Green lantern, apart from the fact that he is green (...and a lantern..?) so for me at least, director Martin Campbell and the mountain of Screen writers who worked on the Green lantern, could have done whatever they wanted to distort the Green Lantern fiction to make it an interesting, or at least entertaining, film. Instead what they gave us was a rather generic super-hero flick which is so full of back-story and explanatory dialogue explaining what the hell is actually going on that it seems he forgot to put in the fun parts. In essence, I feel like the Green Lantern is just trying to do far too much, so much that it fails on its basic principle of being an entertaining film.

Attack the Block Review

It’s like Kidulthood meets Alien, in all the best possible ways, you get me fam?

Aliens are cool right? It’s been a while since aliens have come to Britain, let alone London (unless you count Doctor Who), and I was looking forward to what Joe Cornish, in his debut feature length film, had in mind for this urban invasion, I was hoping for high octane action and rich London slang; Attack the Block supplies both by the bucket load.

The Hangover: Part 2 Review

The Hangover Part 2 is pretty funny and rather enjoyable; that said, it is at its core almost a carbon copy of its predecessor, a predecessor which outstrips it in terms of laughs and especially in terms of originality in almost every way.

It is understandable why there is a second Hangover film. The first, released in 2009, was the highest grossing film in the US for that year and in the top 10 for the world and is credited as being the highest grossing R rated comedy of all time. Obviously this is not the first time that film studios had attempted to capitalise upon a successful film by throwing out a sequel to films that don't really seem to warrant them (actually its probably more surprising when this doesn’t happen) and many of these such films are generally poorer in quality and originality. In some ways, this is the path of this Second Hangover film.

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides Review

Jack is back! but sadly not with much of a bang.

With the emergence of the character of Jack Sparrow as the somewhat unlikely star of the first film in the Pirates of the Caribbean series, the second and third film in the oddly mangled ‘trilogy’ saw Orlando Bloom somewhat sidelined, with Jack taking a more central role as Disney affected the slogan ‘Jack Is Back’. Now 8 years after the original and 4 years after the previous film, Disney have taken this to its fullest, removing those previously central characters entirely and turning the pirates of the Caribbean franchise into one solely dominated by the be-loved Jack Sparrow in a hope to save the now floundering series; Sadly though, it is clear that even the Jack Sparrow cannot alone save this sinking ship alone.

Source Code Review

Source Code is an excellent fast passed yet intelligent tale which will leave you thinking way after its 93 minute running time; well worth watching (if you can still find it in the cinema)

Director Duncan Jones last effort (and debut?), Moon, was downright amazing; probably one of the best Sci-Fi films of recent years, at least for me. Hence, you can understand why I was so excited to see his new effort Source Code, (and wondering why it took me so long to see it – watching it possibly on one of the smallest cinema screens ever), which promised more sci-fi intrigue; it doesn’t disappoint.

Submarine Review

I didn’t really know what to expect from Submarine. The writer-director, Richard Ayoade, is best know for his roll as Moss in the IT Crowd, and I had my doubts about his abilities in a role behind the camera. Perhaps I was expecting the IT crowd, along with all its silliness, but in a different setting; well this isn’t that at all, but for all the right reasons.

SCRE4M Review

Scream 4, simply put, is Meta out the arse, but once you get past this perfect storm of self-referential madness, there isn’t all that much to write home about.

It’s strange to see scream 4 in 2011, or should I say SCRE4M (its always cool when they do that right?…). It’s been over fourteen years since the original and that is a lot of time to leave between a sequel, especially one that is so referential to the genre within which it is couched, and one that has gone through somewhat of a metamorphosis in the intervening decade. Gone are the days of the Slasher flick that characterised horror genre back in the days of Scream 1. Replacing it are other forms of horror, the torture porn genre (probably the worst name you could give anything ever) with films like SAW and Hostel , though even that has probably seen its end. As well as that you have the videotaped, home-made style of horror; starting with Blair Witch in 1999, but more recently seen in the Paranormal Activity films. Alongside these two ‘bastions’ of horror film making you have the rise of the remake, Nightmare on Elm’s street, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, The Amityville Horror and Dawn of the Dead to name but a few. Scream 4 then, attempts, like its predecessors, to de-construct the slasher flick, while also attempting to de-construct these newer horror genre quirks, most notably the idea of a remake.

Rio Review

Every year now there are countless animated films jumping of the Pixar fuelled bandwagon and 2011 is definitely no exception. We’ve already seen Gnomeo and Juliet (…..), Rango, Mars Needs Moms (Moms?) and we have yet to come: Cars 2, Kung Fu Panda 2, Happy Feet 2, Smurfs, Puss in Boots and a number of other 'thrilling' titles. Obviously it is a difficult task to rise above the mediocre in this ever expanding genre, and Rio does just that, and with some style.

Blooded Review

An interesting mockumentary (though there is little mocking to be found) about the issues of extremism and the morality of hunting, this so called ‘horror/thriller’, is actually neither of these, leaving a film with a interesting style, but one that ultimately holds it back as entertainment.

Blooded is definitely an interesting film. Effectively a mockumentary, though shot in a documentary style void of any real ‘mockery’ in a way so realistic and so rigidly held to the conventions of a documentary that after a while it is for all intensive purposes, a documentary, though the events that it documents are far from real.

Sucker Punch Review

It has some great ideas and some equally great actions sequences, but ultimately Sucker Punch is held back by a poorly implemented plot and equally poor acting. That said, if you like hot ladies, you'll probably enjoy this.

Sucker Punch is a strange film, mainly because I can’t really gauge what kind of film it is. Everything about the marketing for it portrayed a straight action film, but in the end it is much more than that, and not always in a good way.

Never Let Me Go Review

Breathtakingly beautiful yet pervasively sinister, Never Let Me Go is pure science Fiction entwined beautifully with a tale of love, loss and morality; it should not be missed.

I wasn’t expecting much from this, I have to say. From the trailers there seemed little here but a love triangle with a mere hint of science fiction backdrop. Well it certainly is that, but it is also much, much more. Based upon Kazuo Ishiguro’s 2005 novel of the same name, Never Let Me Go is set in a alternative almost utopian future in which disease has been almost eradicated and human life has been extended well beyond a hundred years. To this backdrop, the plot follows the plight of three young people, Kathy ‘H’, played by Carey Mulligan (and by an eerily similar Isobel Meikle-Small as the young Kathy), Ruth, played by Keira Knightley (and by Ella Purnell as the younger version) and finally Tommy, played by Andrew Garfield (and Charlie Rowe), through three distinct periods of their lives.

The Eagle Review

4/5

Varrus, give me back my…Eagle?

[WARNING]: This review contains explicit and disturbing references to the acting ability of Channing Tatum, parental caution is advised.

To my mind there have been few truly great historical action-adventures in the last couple of years and not since the days of Ridley Scott’s Gladiator over a decade ago now, have we seen anything spectacular in that mould, at least not in a Roman Context. That is not to say that the Eagle is the film to fill that void, but it certain does scratch the same itch, if not to the same extent, and it is definitely better than Centurion.